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 Jokes

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CerbDawg369
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PostSubject: Jokes   Mon Jun 21, 2010 10:14 pm

Kinda explains itself. Just a thread for ALL kinds of jokes for fun to make people laugh.

DO NOT TAKE ANY PERSONALLY!!! These are all just for fun!!

All kinds are welcome too. Racisist, sexist etc.

This is just meant to make people laugh, not to be mean, rude or offensive
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justaddfaith
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Mon Jun 21, 2010 10:35 pm

hehe... stupid azns... *smirk*
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CerbDawg369
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Mon Jun 21, 2010 10:37 pm



Me and Jackal going on a rant about Dora the Explorer
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That One Jackal
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Mon Jun 21, 2010 10:43 pm

So a guy forgets his wife's anniversary day, she get's pissed &
tells him "There better be something in the garage that goes 0-80 in 3 seconds by tomorrow or I will leave you!" Next morning the man leaves for work, few hours later, the wife gets up & checks the garage & note on the floor. The note said "Here's something that goes 0-80 in 3 seconds, love Tom" She found a weight scale
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Kirill2525
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Mon Jun 21, 2010 10:53 pm

lolz. so a dyslexic walks into a bra.

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Kirill2525
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Mon Jun 21, 2010 11:07 pm


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Maxi
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Mon Jun 21, 2010 11:17 pm

Today the pope was shot multiple times. I guess you can say...
*puts on sunglasses*
... he was holy.
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Kirill2525
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Mon Jun 21, 2010 11:56 pm

i dont get it

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That One Jackal
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 12:04 am

Segovia wrote:
Today the pope was shot multiple times. I guess you can say...
*puts on sunglasses*
... he was holy.
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 12:50 am

Kirill2525 wrote:
i dont get it
It's a pun. Just replace it with the word "wholely" (meaning full of wholes but sounds like holy)
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 12:56 am

Three explores search an uncharted forest. In the middle of the forest they encounter cannibals. They take them to their leader to decide their fate. The leader decides to let them go but first the must collect 10 pieces of fruit of the same variety.

The first explorer came back with 10 apples. The leader then said "Now shove them up your butt. If you make any noise in doing so then we will kill you." The first one went in fine but the second one made him groan. He was killed. The second explorer came back with 10 blueberries. The leader said the same thing he said to the first explorer. Berries 1-9 went in fine but on the last one, he laughed. He was killed.

When the first two explorers met in heaven, the first explore asked the second one why he'd laugh. He said he laughed because he saw the third guy come back with Pineapples.
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Kirill2525
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 1:04 am

LOL Exclamation

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 5:06 am


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justaddfaith
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 3:38 pm

@sagovia, you never cease with your humor.

I spent a good 30 seconds laughing Exclamation
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 4:02 pm

Thanks faith! I aim to please. Just let me say before we go further on with this thread, let me suggest that we don't use holocaust jokes. I don't think they're funny, Anne Frankly, I find them a little offensive.
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 4:25 pm

LOLZ. i know a bunch of jew jokes,

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 4:30 pm

I just kidding about the holocaust jokes. Go head and post them. Here I'll start.

How many jews can you fit into a car? two in the front, two in the back, and 6 million in the ash tray.
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 4:41 pm

BASTERD, i was gona say that. whats the difference between a jew and a piza? a piza doesnt scream in the oven.

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 4:43 pm

Haha sorry. ^^ What's the worse thing about being a black jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 4:51 pm

meh. If the ocean was vodka and i were a duck, id swim to the bottom and drink my way up. But the oceans not vodka, and im not a duck so pass me the bottle and shut the fuck up. (no one better edit the "fuck out")

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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 8:59 pm

actually, ive heard that one before. *yawn* come on Seggy, you can do better!! >Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 9:04 pm

yo mama;s like a shotgun, 2 cocks and she's loaded.

Yo mamas like a bowling ball, she gets picked up, fingerd, thrown in the gutter, and she comes back for more.

yo mama's like a vaccume cleaner, she blows all day and gets laid in the closet.

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CerbDawg369
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Tue Jun 22, 2010 11:05 pm

Head 'em lol you hear all those in southern cali.

Few black jokes:

Whats long, dark and stinks? The line at the DMV office

Whats the difference between a bucket of sh*t and a black guy? The bucket

Sex joke:

A cucumber, a pickle and a penis all get together to hang out. The cucumber says "You guys think you got it bad!? When i get plump and hard they cut me up and put me in a salad to eat me!" The pickle says "You think you got it bad!? When i get plump and hard they put me in vinegar till im wrinkly and sour!" The penis says "You think you got it bad!? When i get plump and hard they put a bag over my head, stuff me in a tight dark place and bang my head against a wall till i throw up all over myself!!"
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Wed Jun 23, 2010 12:05 am

Haha awesome!
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PostSubject: Re: Jokes   Wed Jun 23, 2010 12:15 am

What can LifeSavers do that men can't.
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